Two words.....

BOSTON QUALIFIED!

It wasn't easy and it was close....3:50:09...thank goodness they take up to :59 seconds past the qualifying time. That was the hardest race EVER.

Running Buddy made me this T-Shirt.....and I can't wait to crack open the champagne tomorrow with her! Right now, its all about the beer and the relief. Full race report tomorrow as I have taken the day off from work! It was an interesting race.....

Thanks for all the kind comments and support friends!!! It sure is nice to be a part of such a tight nit community of runners!

One Deep Breath

I can't believe that tomorrow is almost here....as in tomorrow I will be running my 7th marathon. This time, it's not about "just finishing" but about racing. I have never in my life "raced" a marathon but this time it's real. I'm still a little on the fence about my pace but I'm shooting for an 8:40 mpm which should bring me in just under the 3:50 finish time I need for Boston.

To say I'm nervous is putting it so mildly that it's almost not worth mentioning.

I went to the expo yesterday to get my number and chip and of course do a little frivolous spending....by the way I found a very cute podium jacket with the Shamrock logo.....makes me feel "elite" Ha! 

Anyway, as I was wandering around the expo with purchases in hand, I came across a vendor who was selling t-shirts that said "One Deep Breath" and in an oval surrounding the saying are some other motivating quotes such as "keep life simple, enjoy every moment" etc. Well, it certainly caught my eye as I have been sweating and sitting on pins and needles all week.

Is it really that simple to just take "one deep breath"? 

Yes, it really IS that simple to take one deep breath today.....because each time I do, I feel just a little more relaxed and a little less stressed and it reminds me to just breathe and enjoy. It will be what it is....no matter what I do.

So, a few mantras to take with me tomorrow.....thank you to the Laminator and Frayed Laces for "Don't Deny Your Awesomeness" and I will remind myself at the start and throughout the race to take "One Deep Breath."

It has been one HELL of a journey since my running of the Shamrock last year at this time with my Running Buddy who is also stressing and nervous. I realized just how much I have been through emotionally and physically and I know in my heart I am a much stronger woman for it.

So, here I go ready or not!!! And the weather?? P-E-R-F-E-C-T!!!! Upper 40's at the start, mid 50's near the end and FULL ON SUNSHINE with very little wind.

Here are some random pictures of my family....me, Wonder Boy (at the Hair of the Dog 5K) and Bailey (just before he passed away)....enjoy and send the good marathon vibes blogger buds!!

Hardcore defined

This weekend, I may have discovered  one element that can define one as a hardcore runner......freezing rain. Yes, running in the freezing rain. I suffered through weather conditions that would send most normal minded people onto their couch all day with a good movie or book. 

I'm not sure the word "miserable" does me justice when I describe how I felt running my 20 miler in the rain on Saturday.

The forecast was for a coastal storm to start creeping up through the Carolinas this weekend and it all began Saturday morning. I got awake to darkening skies....and Running Buddy and I both had our last long run scheduled for that morning. We had not planned to run together, but we both knew the impending conditions. Neither of us wanted to suffer alone. So after a few texts and some last minute planning, we made it out to the official starting point of the Shamrock Marathon ready to simulate 20 miles on the course. As soon as I picked Running Buddy up, the rain started.

Luckily for us, it was an easy start with the wind to our backs and we were both pretty well layered (another plug for that very cool Nike jacket I bought a while back). We made it about 9 miles until we hit the boardwalk into the wind and that's when the misery started.

The wind must have been blowing 10-15 mph steady with gusts up to 20 and the rain was beating us to death. We ran about 20 streets up the boardwalk and exited onto the trolley lane heading to the north end. That was around mile 12. By this time, things were starting to get really tough.

Running Buddy and I trudged up towards the north end in blustery wind driven rain. By mile 14, we were soaked, tired and hungry so we stopped to eat. More trouble began as we tried to start back up and my Running Buddy got panicked over being cold and wet. She says "Kelly! I'm miserable!" We really didn't have much further to go and we were not far from the car on the turn around, so, after asking "What would YOU do??"....Running Buddy put on the tough girl panties and made it all the way to the turn around with a potty break near the end.

So, what defines us as hardcore runners? Probably more adverse conditions than I could list in my post. I know that my Running Buddy has suffered through major bouts of trots and hydration issues and now she has learned to brave the elements. She is becoming hardcore.

But I realized something about myself on that miserable run on Sunday....3 hours in 40 degree temps with wind and rain. I discovered that I have strengthened my ability to endure pain and misery. I guess you just do as a result of running which inflicts some pain on you most of the time. But the will to go on when the conditions just SUCK.....that's strength I never thought I had.

So, I like to think that yeah, I'm a bit crazy and obsessed in my running....but I've become a little more hardcore.

Miserable highlights:

1. Major boob burn from a soaking wet bra that has now turned into a dry scab ouch

2. Hands so cold from wet gloves, I started to see stars

3. Hallucinated a port a john that actually turned out to be a transit bus...hell they were the             same color.

4. Drymax socks WORK! Hey, the socks were soaked and I swear it never felt like it.

5. The Nike Jacket stayed dry for about 15 miles...but then it was a wet rag. 

6. My Nike Livestrong capris beaded the rain the entire 20 miles and ended up winning the "driest piece of clothing" award from yours truly.

7. The mind can talk the body into anything the heart has the will to do.....just believe in the run. (That's my feeble attempt to get all deep and philosophical) 

So, that's the story in all its glory....time for taper!

Photo Moments

We are creeping up on the 3 week taper time and oddly, I feel rather calm. Even with my expectations and goals for this upcoming marathon....there is an odd sense of calmness about me. Maybe its after losing Bailey that I have put things in perspective....or maybe I am experiencing delayed onset of marathon nerves....but, I do feel strangely at peace with my running and my expectations for the Shamrock Marathon.

With that being said, thought I might post some pictures from the last of the distance series runs. I just love the folks at Triduo here in old Tidewater...they take awesome pictures, get your pictures posted fast and will even take personal shots of you and your buds at the races if you catch up with one of their photographers and ask. 

I call this one "Heh??"

And this one....Could I get any happier??

Seriously, the story behind this lovely photo goes like this....me and Running Buddy and New Runner Friend are coming down a hill and I say "Gee I wonder if the photographer will catch my sistas (aka breasts) bouncing up or down...." and the photographer standing on the side of the road says..."for an extra fee we can fix that!" and we all started laughing...hence the way too happy runner look.

Locked, loaded and ready to run....always keeping my goal pace in mind.

Running Buddy and I have been doing less runs together these days as we have grown apart a little in our distances and paces during these last few weeks. Plus, I haven't been much of a good partner since Bailey died. Running less with my partner feels like a loss to me. And it's just astounding to me how losing the most unconditional love I have ever known (my dog) has knocked me down. Last night, I was thinking how a part of my heart died with Bailey and a piece of me has gone with him. I hate coming home to an empty house and it always brings tears to my eyes.

Thanks to Sam I Am who commented the great quote about grieving being like the ocean...like the ebbing and flowing and coming of the waves....that really struck me. Thanks Sam...

This weekend is my last 20 mile run before the marathon. Oddly, Im looking forward to the challenge of the 8:40 min. per mile pace I am supposed to do ....but the weather...it aint lookin' so good as a coastal storm approaches. I will post a report on Sunday.

TGIF friends!

Coming out of the dark

I think I may be coming around the bend on this whole grieving process. I still miss Bailey like crazy...but I don't seem to cry as often. Only when certain things pop up and sometimes it still hurts to come home to an empty house.

I did have an interview last week with the South Eastern Virginia Golden Retriever Rescue group to see if I would be a good candidate to adopt a puppy from a litter that was born 3 weeks ago. There were 70 golden retrievers rescued from a puppy mill in Suffolk Virginia about a month ago. The story is sad ....but I think I may be able to give one of those goldens a good home. It just might be what I need to heal my heart.

I have still been running and I think it's getting a little bit better. I don't dread it as much and I don't get as emotional. It's been the longest and hardest 3 weeks of running and to top it off....I hurt my right knee a little bit at the last distance series....so I have been battling a bit of an injury. To top that one off....I caught my third round of the funk. No surprises there though...we had an epidemic flu outbreak at my school where 10% of our kids were out all in one day not to mention all the teachers including Running Buddy who got the stomach flu version. I just have the upper respiratory annoying stuff. To top of Running Buddy's woes...she fell hard like I did when Bailey died. That's a true friend....one that grieves right by your side.

We finished the last of the Tidewater Distance Series tune ups today. It was a 30k.....Running Buddy and I started together but she dropped back around mile 10 to about a 9 minute mile while I kept up the 8:30 with another runner who was pacing us.

Today's run was a success and morale booster. We averaged 8:36 for the 30K. The route was hilly and long so I feel good about today's pace. I haven't been doing any track repeats because of my knee but I have kept up with all the long runs and the mid week tempos. Last Saturday, I finished a 20 miler at 8:40...so I haven't lost too much considering I cut back miles and have missed 3 weeks of track repeats. It's all still up in the air.

Thanks to all my blogger friends who were so compassionate in your comments regarding my dog Bailey. He meant the world to me and my life hasn't been the same since he died. But I am so grateful for all the kind comments and prayers. Hope you all are having great runs and races and I should be back in action before too long. Only one more week to taper madness!!

A Golden Angel in Heaven

I am experiencing one of the darkest days of my life right now....my beautiful golden retriever Bailey was put to sleep a week ago today. He was 2 months shy of his 10th birthday.

I can not even put into words the amount of grief and despair I am going through right now. It has been an all out effort to get out of bed in the morning and go to work. Thank goodness for the wonderful friends I am blessed to work with.

Bailey was everything to me. He was every aspect of my life. He was the first thing I saw in the morning and the last thing thing I saw before I drifted off to sleep. He entered my life as a young pup....and I was just entering my 30's. He saw me through my worst relationship breakup, the move into a new house....and countless hours of laughter, tears and walks on the beach.

My life is empty without him right now and I can only describe myself as an empty shell of who I was before he died. 

It was very sudden, although he had a tumor in his heart that was probably there for a long time. But last Sunday night, he woke very early in the morning....and began to slip away.

The lesson I learned was a very hard and painful one. Although it sounds incredibly cliche', I did learn in the most horrific and sickening way, that every day is precious and you should live it like it was your last. 

Because if I had only known.....it was my last night with my dog, that it would be the last walk, the last romp in the back yard and the last swim in the ocean.....well, I would pray that time would have stopped.....so that I could soak in every moment and savor it like I would never taste it again. I wasn't ready for Bailey to go....as if anyone is ever ready to lose something they love so dearly.....but maybe, just maybe, I would have appreciated the little moments with my dog more. 

Because I would give my soul.....for just one more walk on the beach with him.

Running hasn't shown me much sympathy....and I have struggled to stay on my routine. I continue to struggle but make myself do what I know heals my soul. For now, I prefer to be alone in my running......for the sake of my partner...I try to run alone. Lord knows I'm not much company....but all I have left now...is my running. It gets me through those sad moments.

Only 6 more weeks until the marathon...and my desire to qualify for Boston seems to have faded with the passing of my dog. I'm just going to give myself some time....and I hope to get back in the game soon.

I am thinking of you my friends and hoping you all are having good runs and races.....and remember to treat every run.....and every day as if it were your last.

Past, Present.....Future

Seems like lately on several of my runs....I am constantly thinking about how my running has changed from this time last year to now. My transformation from then to now still amazes me and I still can't believe I made it this far.

I was checking on my Garmin downloads from last year at this time when I was again...training for the Shamrock Marathon. My paces and results are vastly different:

Past:                                                                         

1/12/08  7 miles 1:06  9:31 mpm                                

1/15/08  8 miles 1:16   9:30 mpm                             

1/18/08  8 miles 1:14  9:18 mpm 

                               

Present:

1/12/09 7 miles 58 min 8:16 mpm

1/17/09 13.1 miles 1:51 8:30 mpm

1/18/09 7 miles 57 min 8:10 mpm

In just one year, I am running much stronger and way faster. Those past 9+ minutes per mile were my fastest and hardest of the entire training cycle. As I look farther into my training last year, I see the times get slower.....like 10 minutes plus. I don't even want to post my long run paces. Eeks...

So, its a big plug for the speed work. That has been a major help for me.

As for my future pace.....well......I'm hoping for my BQ pace of 8:45 or better. Time will tell....

This was a crazy COLD week of running. Man.....it tested my will for sure and THANK GOODNESS for Running Buddy....if wasn't for the fact that she was just as willing to suck it up as I was, I would have pussed out for sure. 

Wednesday started the arctic blast with temps barely making it into the 30's. Running Buddy and I did a mid week long run of 9 miles at a pace of 8:40. Thursday was speed work on the boardwalk. We were on for 6x800 meters @ 3:23. Well, temps were right at 30 degrees with a a very very stiff north wind. We started in the north direction for the first 3 repeats and that almost killed us both. Our repeat times were not good......3:25, 3:40, 3:45. Then we turned around into the wind for the last 3 and came much closer to target....3:23, 3:24, 3:25. Not bad considering how cold and zapped we both were.

Friday, we did a 6 mile recovery run after school with the temps only in the 20's. Saturday we did our long run of 13 miles at a target pace of 8:30 mpm. It was terribly cold again.....22 degrees at the start. But the pace warmed us quickly and we were hot messes at the end. I am so proud of my partner for really holding a pace she never thought she could.

Today, it snowed on my 7 miler.....it was so wonderful. It didn't stick of course, but it sure was pretty to see nickel sized flakes falling on me as I zoomed through the 'hood!

Stay warm friends and congratulations to all the marathoners this weekend!